Personal update

Click to enlarge

Click to enlarge

Hi everybody,

I’m tempted by long habit to write a story about how I’ve been suffering what feels like a demon-haunted mid-life crisis, and how I’ve recently come out the other side with a new outlook on life and a whole new set of personal goals. I have let go of a few decades-old dreams and ways of living that were holding me back, and have woken up to a part of me that feels like it’s been asleep for twenty years.

But one of my new resolutions is not to waste any more time explaining myself for no reason. So, above is a work-in-progress photo of an oil painting I’m working on; the first one I’ve ever done. I’m learning a lot every day.

I’m not very interested in writing any more. But I am still interested in the artistic side of the hobby – even more than before in fact. So I’ll keep you all posted. Thank you for reading, my friends.

Till next time,


6 thoughts on “Personal update

  1. Thor says:

    I’ve always wanted to try my hand at oil painting. Some day when I have the space I’ll have to finally do it.

    Great job on your painting. Your first? Impressive actually. You’ve got some great blending and great contrast. I can’t imagine my first would look nearly this good.

    On the personal front, good for you. We all have our issues and baggage and to recognize it and work towards addressing it is a big thing.

    • beat ronin says:

      Hi Thor, thank you for taking the time to comment. It’s my first oil painting but I used to do acrylic paintings and draw quite a lot when I was a kid. The medium of oil is very exciting though, I feel like once I get used to how it moves around on the surface there are just so many effects and styles that could be created.

      As for the personal stuff… it’s been a strange and difficult few months for me. Nothing dramatic on the outside, but inside I’ve changed a lot, and it caught me by surprise. I feel the same, but very different. Maybe like a snake that has shed it’s old skin.

  2. I’ve always admired people who can draw (or paint) since I can’t. Good on you for doing it. I’ve near had a mid-life crisis (perhaps I’ve not reached mid-life, or maybe I passed it and didn’t notice). But, I did have a mid-twenties crisis, so I sympathize with the dark night of the soul.

    Art so often helps.

    • beat ronin says:

      Thanks Cedric.

      My partner had a mid-twenties crisis. I was lucky on that front, but it really took me by surprise this time. I’m getting near forty, so it’s right on schedule (maybe a bit early), but I just never thought I was the sort of person who would suffer this sort of thing. I always try to live honestly and with no regrets. Turns out I was not as true to myself as I thought. But you live and learn as they say.

  3. Oakenhawk says:

    That looks incredible. Kudos!

    I had a quarter-life crisis of sorts, post graduation from University. It took me a few months to work through, and at the end of it all I wound up with a hilariously impractical car. It kind of stands as a tribute to how silly those (sometimes arbitrary) benchmarks we set for ourselves are. “I’m [XX] Years old and what do I have to show for myself” shows a lack of perspective, and it can take a while to re-adjust your lens. Anyways….

    That’s what I worked through. Not sure if it’s in any-way similar to your experiences…

    Cheers Mr. Ronin, catch you around!

    • beat ronin says:

      Thank you Oak. I’m nearly finished it now and keen to start on the next one.

      I think what you described is kind of like what I’ve been going through. Basically I realised that so far in my adult life I’d ignored developing my natural talents and instead tried really hard to develop skills in areas I didn’t have a particular talent or love for. I’m not sure why I did this. Maybe I was afraid of success, given that the only art I practiced over the last fifteen or twenty years was in the safe space of “hobbies” so there was no pressure. Realising all this made me feel a lot of regret, which I had to overcome.

      Thanks for sharing your experience 🙂

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